RIGHT THE SHIP

 I grew up loving the Toronto Argonauts and the CFL generally. Back in the 60's and early 70's, the NHL and the CFL were the big leagues. Our TV's could only pull in a total of 12 channels and about half of them were from Buffalo, New York, so we could get a baseball game every Saturday afternoon ( usually featuring the Yankees or Cardinals as the home team ) and the NFL would provide maybe 2 games on a Sunday. So, the pickings were kind of slim when you were a kid who worshipped sports and athletes.

The Argonauts commanded my attention from July until late November, when hockey and the Leafs would take over until May. The Stanley Cup playoffs were not the marathon that they are today: a champion would be crowned in only two playoff rounds. So that meant that we could go outside and play with our friends in the good weather and dream of hitting home runs alongside Mickey Mantle, or scoring hat tricks with Dave Keon and Frank Mahovlich, or running into the end zone with Bill Symons or catching touchdown passes from Wally Gabler or Tom Wilkinson.

Recent years watching my beloved Argos have been painful. Not because they have necessarily been bad teams ( they have won at least 2 Grey Cups in this century ), but because they have become such an irrelevance in the Toronto sports universe. Nobody cares about them: they are often a page 3 afterthought in the sports pages. They get barely a ripple on TV sports reports. Radio treats them like Korean 3rd division soccer. And the fans have apparently deserted them as well. Crowds hover around 10,000 a home game: in the 70's and 80's, they routinely drew in excess of 40,000.

What happened ? 

There's no doubt that the competition from other teams and events like the Jays, Raptors, TFC, the Honda Indy and Rogers Cup tennis have all eroded the solid base the Argos enjoyed among Toronto sports fans. There's just too much entertainment to go around in the city. And there is also little doubt that Toronto has changed, grown and become very diverse, all good things. But, with the proliferation of people from all parts of the world, the truly "international" sports do very well, especially basketball and soccer. Argos fans are still mainly from the older, whiter, more traditional demographic and the Argos have not done particularly well trying to attract fans from the other demographics, despite some valiant efforts. 

The Argos are one of the best teams getting out into the community. The players visit hospitals and schools. They lead in programmes that promote anti-bullying and inclusion. They work in soup kitchens and other charitable activities. They are genuinely liked and respected by the people who benefit from their efforts, but, again, this doesn't translate into more fans in the seats of games.

There is a lingering perception that the CFL and the Argos are "small time", and this does not do well with the fans who want "big league" extravagant sports. Hockey is different and always will be because it's embedded into the cultural fabric of the nation. Football used to be that way, but, alas, no longer, not when kids can get a soccer ball and go play with not a lot of expense and risk. Football is a dangerous and expensive sport, the argument goes .... but then again, so is hockey.

Clearly, the Argos need to operate differently from the other CFL teams. The Argos were most successful when they spent money on high-profile players from the NFL or US college ball and became the "city slickers" that the rest of the country grew to hate. Stadiums were full when Joe Theissman, Eric Allen, Anthony Davis, Terry Metcalfe, Rocket Ismail and the like wore double blue and became the darlings of the Toronto "fair weather fans" who liked image and sizzle more than the grunt work and sweat and blood of real football. They also became the hated enemies of fans in Regina, Ottawa and especially Hamilton, who saw them as the glamour boys who needed to be taught a lesson in real football. It wasn't sustainable in the long term, of course, but it was great while it lasted.

But the Argos hang in there and keep trying. If ever there was an "A For Effort" award in sports, the Argos would win it. They loyally stick to the CFL's modest and realistic business plan, which ensures that most teams in small markets can survive with crowds of around 25,000 per game and a TV deal from TSN that is actually a bargain for the network. All of this means that the Argos are seen as just another team like the Riders, Als, Redblacks and (gasp) TigerCats.

Maybe the time has come for another sugar daddy to step up, buy the Argos and run them like the old days, CFL rules be damned. Time for the old buccaneering spirit that raided the NFL with a  bold swagger and a "who cares about the future, let's have a good time now" attitude. It could right the ship for the Argos, at least in the short term. It could also bankrupt the team.

But what have they got to lose ? Right now, they're alive but they're a great big yawn too. In entertainment, a yawn is as good as an obituary.

WHEN THE DUST SETTLES

 Recently, the sight of a pickup truck carrying large Canadian flags in the box has cause my gorge to rise, in true Hamlet style. I have nothing against pickup trucks per se, but the combination of the truck and the flag brings back really bad memories of the so-called "Freedom Convoy" that laid siege to downtown Ottawa and the border crossing at Windsor this past winter. The stupidity and the naked anger of those convoy nuts has made me shudder at the sight at the symbol of my country, a place that I love.

Today, I saw a pickup with the flag with an interesting quote decal on the back window. It read "I support pipelines. My truck runs on gas, not unicorns or pixie dust. F*CK TRUDEAU !" I looked at the truck and the redneck inside it: it was all I could do to stop myself from walking over and challenging him. My wife, normally the most placid person in the world, shook her head in disgust at this foulmouthed expression of the man's right to free speech. We shrugged and went on our way, but the knot in my stomach still remains.

Why am I telling you this true story ?

Because Doug Ford won a second term as premier by a landslide, that's why. Let me explain.

I'm pretty sure the dickhead in the pickup truck voted for Ford. I'm pretty sure most of the dickheads from Ontario in those convoys voted for Ford. I'm pretty sure the angry, cement-heads who were vaccine deniers and anti-mask mandate advocates voted for Ford. And I'm pretty sure that ..... the list goes on.

Ford stumbled his way like a clown at a circus through most of his 4 year term. He badly mishandled the funding for families of autistic children in the early days of his regime. He cut nursing staff and educational staff. He tried to get us to switch to Tory-blue license plates that nobody could read at night. He wants to build a highway through the green belt. He took the federal government to the Supreme Court, challenging the feds' right to implement carbon pricing, against all reasonable legal advice, and LOST, costing us around 50 million dollars in the process. He forced gas stations to put stickers on gas pumps decrying the carbon price, regardless of the gas station owner's opinion on the matter. He refused to deliver the most recent budget by the required time, knowing that the undoubted deficit could conceivably cost him the election. And he went to a Conservative convention in the US declaring that he was a "big Republican" and expressed his admiration for the abominable Donald Trump, although Ford later walked that back when Trump hit us with certain punitive tariffs. 

And then there's the pandemic. Remember the "ring of iron" he was going to build around Long Term Care homes ? Where is it? Remember the awkward roll-out of the vaccination process ? Ford blamed the federal government for this, despite the fact that were plenty of doses of vaccine to go around once Pfizer got their manufacturing glitch together. Remember the first and second re-openings, granted against the advice of all reasonable doctors ? Remember firing the first Chief Medical Officer when he subtly criticized Ford's moves, only to be replaced by a Tory hack, Dr. Kieran Moore ? Remember Moore having to give the press conferences explaining the need to go back to some restrictions, while Ford disappeared ? Remember Ford spending time at the family cottage in the early going, despite the "advice" given by Ford himself to stay at home and not go to the cottage, spreading the virus ?

Despite this sorry litany of woe, Ford won a landslide this past week. It boggles the mind, but some careful thought can explain why this buffoon is still the Premier of Ontario.

It's because the other parties are equal buffoons. They offered up no real alternative to the Tories. Their campaigns were weak, mealy-mouthed, pathetic efforts to get noticed. Andrea Horwath, despite her earnest and hard-working personality, is branded as a 3-time loser, and the NDP have no discernable policies. And Steven Del Duca has the charisma and excitement of paste. The Liberals offered up a clumsy government at the last election four years ago and have learned nothing from that humbling experience. They even chose a cabinet minister from the much unloved Kathleen Wynne government, Del Duca himself, as their "new" leader. And, for whatever craven reason, the media mostly chose to ignore them, and didn't bother to give them an opportunity to explain whatever policies they had. Couple this with the absolute silence from Ford and other Tory candidates when approached by the media, and we had a campaign straight out of the TV series "Seinfeld" ... a show about nothing.

We deserve better. But this sorry series of events inspired only 48 % of us to get off our lazy asses and vote. Ford got an impressive 83 seats .... with about 41 % of the votes cast. That means that 49 % of us who bothered to vote didn't vote for the clown-car government that Ford offered us. But that's what you get with "first past the post" .... and that's a discussion for another day.

Clearly something needs to be done. In a recent edition of SOPS Quarterly, I wrote an article entitled "De-Cleft The Left" , a phrase borrowed from a good guy I know who happens to be a former federal MP. I argued that it's high time for the Liberals, NDP and even the Greens to put aside their petty jealousies, rivalries and prejudices, swallow their pride, lick their wounds and get on with the process of MERGING their parties into one party that represents most of us in Ontario. Such a merger would give those of us in the majority, who don't buy into the Tories'
pablum and crap, a chance to keep them out of power. 

And, for god's sake, pick a leader with some fire in the belly, some passion, and some willingness to take on the obese, badly-educated and possibly criminal premier we have to suffer under for the next four years.

And for any conservatives who actually bother to read this and are offended by my words .... well, there's irony for you. Figure it out.

"He Fights."

 History is a fantastic teacher. Our past experiences, no matter what sphere of human endeavour they may be a part of, are rich in lessons that subsequent generations can study and learn from. The problem, as I have written many times before, is that we are poor students. We have short memories and attention spans. We believe that the only true experiences are those that happen to us immediately and directly, or to others within our narrow sphere of existence. If it doesn't happen to me, my family, or my friends, it isn't real.

In the current battle against the covid virus, we had up until a month ago tricked ourselves into believing that we had it licked. The reality is that the omicron variant has wreaked havoc on our health care system, our outlook on the virus, our habits, our day-to-day activities and business, our schools and our manner of reporting the news events concerning the pandemic. And, as a consequence, our leaders have fallen victim to a type of paralysis in decision making that defies credulity.

In the American Civil War, a similar situation presented itself to Abraham Lincoln, the president of the US at the time of the southern insurrection. Lincoln had every intention of fighting the war because he believed that the secession of the southern states was illegal, and that the very survival of the republic founded "four-score" years prior depended on a Union victory. Lincoln was single-minded about the prosecution of the war, and was determined to win. But the problem was that the people he put in charge of the Union armies in the earliest stages of the war didn't share his optimism or determination to win.

One by one, Union generals were put in command of key components of the Union army. And, time after time, they fought their southern rivals to, at best, stalemate after stalemate or, at worst, complete and utter defeat. The southern generals had more to lose than their Union counterparts, to be sure, but the hesitance, the risk-averse attitude, and the uncertainty of Union generals like McClellan, Meade, Pope, Hooker ( who at least was willing to give battle to the southern forces, earning him the nickname "Fighting Joe Hooker" ) and Burnside ( whose main claim to fame was lending a version of his last name to the practice of men growing out their side whiskers, or "sideburns" ) created a stumbling and unsuccessful series of campaigns that drove Lincoln to frustration. 

Pope

Meade

McClellan

Hooker

Burnside


It wasn't until Lincoln put Ulysses S. Grant in charge of the Union forces, that things began to improve for rhe north. When asked why Lincoln gave the task to Grant, the president simply replies "He fights." Lincoln admired Grant's determination as well as his skill and intelligence. Finally, he found a man that would eliminate the timid and tentative leadership that had plagued the north for so many years.             


Grant delivered. There are those who write about military strategy and tactics and find Grant's approach to war repugnant. He was referred to as a "butcher" by southern historians because Grant was not afraid to take casualties or put his men in harm's way as long as the enemy suffered more than his troops did.

By and large, he made as many enemies as friends and as many critics as admirers. But what is undeniable is that he was successful. He gave Lincoln the victory that was necessary to ensure the survival of the American republic to the present day.   

In our modern pandemic-laden world, we are now in the fifth wave of the scourge. Our leadership has proven to be as risk-averse, hesitant, and tentative as the original Union generals. Nobody seems capable to making a firm decision. Everyone is careful of the language they use in the interminable news reports. Decisions are not made until poll numbers are analyzed and scrutinized. When the need arises for bold, visionary leadership, we get bumbling and mealy-mouthed platitudes from premiers, ministers, mayors, doctors, administrators and managers. We have nothing but McClellans, Meades, Popes, Hookers, Burnsides ..... when we really need a Grant. 

We, the people, are like Lincoln. We want this war against the coronavirus finished. And we demand a complete victory over the virus. We must find our Grant. We need a leader, a doctor, an administrator who will do the right things, no matter the price and no matter the criticism. We need a leader who "fights."                                                                           

Grant