When I was a kid, I wanted desperately to be like a couple of the leading figures of the 60's and early 70's. Young kids are engaged in a struggle to establish an identity for themselves and often look to role models for guidance. Family members and friends are usually not good for this, for the simple reason that they are too familiar, too close and too readily available.
For me, I wanted to be just like John Lennon. Not just the John Lennon of the early iteration of the Beatles, but the John Lennon of the last few years of the band, when he set himself apart from the others as the rebel, the "bad boy" of the group. To be sure, all the Beatles were in some ways "cool" but Lennon was the acknowledged leader of the group and, thus, the most "cool." His style, his manner and, most of all, his music made him the object of my admiration. While Paul McCartney was writing lovely songs like "Hey Jude" and "Let It Be", and George Harrison was developing his art with "My Guitar Gently Weeps", Lennon was rocking his way through "Revolution" , "Dear Prudence" and "Happiness is a Warm Gun". These were songs that were edgy and ones that your parents were sure not to like, while they would hum along to the McCartney tunes.
Thus, the search for "cool" began when I was around 13 years old. What is "cool"? One could consult the dictionary and find a formal and somewhat stodgy definition that helps in the beginning of understanding of cool. Part of it is a certain rebelliousness: Lennon had that in droves. I wanted that.
But later, I discovered another guy that helped me define the term. Around age 16, I discovered the music and style of Cat Stevens. Now, this was a guy who I definitely wanted to emulate, mainly because a girl I liked back then was in love with him. I really liked the image of Cat. The beard, the long flowing hair, the dark mystery of him … and, of course, so much musical talent, although it was not really like Lennon's. There was not much edgy or rebellious about Stevens' music. But it was very introspective and philosophical, which was part of his "cool". As I grew older, I tried to mimic Stevens. I learned the guitar mainly because of him, I tried to grow a beard ( successfully, in my 20's ) and let my hair grow longer. But, while Stevens was dark and brooding, my beard was Celtic red and my hair was straight and somewhat thinner than his leonine main. Oh well, it was a good try.
My search for cool expanded beyond music in my later teens. I became a huge fan of Pierre Trudeau, our first and, really, only "cool" Prime Minister. There was a certain ice water in the man's veins. He was a coldly rational and pure intellectual man, which I admired. But there was also a steely toughness about him. My two favourite cool Trudeau moments were when he was accosted at the St Jean Baptiste parade in Montreal in 1968 , when objects were hurled at the reviewing stand where he was seated. His security detail wanted to get him out of there for fears of the growing Separatist and FLQ threats and mounting violence and agitation of that night. Trudeau refused to show fear or weakness and toughed it out, dodging bottles and rocks thrown at him and he chided his guards, telling them to leave if they wanted to, he was staying. Man, that's balls.
The second example of Trudeau cool was during the height of the October Crisis in 1970, when the FLQ kidnapped two people, murdering one of them. Trudeau called in the army through the War Measures Act and went eyeball to eyeball with the terrorists. But that wasn't the cool part. One day, Trudeau was confronted by a reporter on Parliament Hill, challenging the implementation of the War Measures Act. Trudeau stood his ground with the reporter, giving back to the man, and actually making the reporter look and sound stupid. When the reporter asked the PM just how far he'd go in this showdown with the terrorists, Trudeau famously replied, "Just watch me." That was badass.
In university, my search for a cool icon branched out, depending on what I was studying. When I was studying English lit, I looked to a whole raft of heros: Shakespeare, Marlowe, Chaucer, Byron, Cervantes … the list was endless, but the problem with these figures was that they were long-dead and there were only imprecise images of them. Only their words, their fantastic words, made them cool. But of more modern writers, Leonard Cohen was unmistakably cool. His poetry and music were terrific and, again, he was unbelievably popular with women. He wrote few novels, but one of them, "The Favourite Game" was, and still is, a novel I enjoy. The protagonist was a thinly-disguised Cohen : confidence bordering on arrogance, bravado, love of music, wine and women … it sounded like a recipe for success to me.
When I studied history, though, it was undoubtedly Ernesto "Che" Guevara as my cool icon. In my many visits to Cuba, I have become fascinated with the man, mainly because of the legend of this quixotic revolutionary, tilting at windmills and courageously beating against the stream. The truth of his life is somewhat less romantic, but no matter: after Corda's famous photograph of the idealistic revolutionary "commandante", gazing into a wondrous utopian future, Che's true life story didn't really alter my view of him. Like Cat Stevens, Che had the "look" that I wanted to emulate because women loved it. Only recently have I broadened my knowledge of the man: I still admire him, but I no longer idolize him. He had his faults, massive faults …. who doesn't ?
In more recent years, Barack Obama has held a fascination for me. I completely have a "bromance" going for the last good President. His sweeping intellect, his poetic speeches, his breadth of knowledge on so many diverse topics make him attractive. But, more than that, his class and elegance speaks volumes. While President, Obama had to endure some of the most outrageous slurs, attacks and charges against his character, his family, and his policies. And he fought back with intelligence, charm, wit, humour and patience. I don't know how he did it. If it were me, I'd be slinging the mud back at my detractors harder and with more fury than they hurled it at me. And, in the age of Trump, his voice and timing are appreciated more than ever. He doesn't go after Trump repeatedly or viciously, as Trump goes after him. Obama waits for the right moment, then unleashes the right words, delivered with grace and dignity, but clearly critical of the buffoon who currently holds the office of President. "Elegance" is the word that best defines Barack Obama.
And in my own family, I had a cool role model as well, although I didn't see him as often as I would've liked. My mom's younger brother, John Day, my Uncle Jack was always a cool guy to me. Good looking, good-humoured, a fine family man, stylish and suave: that was my Uncle Jack. He had an appreciation for nice cars ( Jaguars, mostly ), boats, good food and drink. And he was a genuinely nice guy, always with a smile and a good word. We lost Uncle Jack this past March, a very sad thing indeed. But I will always consider him one of the coolest guys I've had the pleasure of knowing.
So, after all that, how does one define "cool"? I guess the safe answer is that there is no one, single thing that sets a person off as cool. For me, it's a combination of all the things described above. A "cool" guy has to be smart, elegant but not showy, confident without arrogance, a slight swagger to him, rebellious but not dangerous or foolish, talented in many ways, appreciative of the good things in life but not overtly materialistic, quiet but able to converse intelligently on a variety of topics, willing to admit when he's wrong or does not have a certain knowledge, willing to learn new things, and, above all else, have charisma.
And the most important thing I've learned: you can't acquire cool, you have to be born with it.
